Open Letter

Dear me,




Twenty years from now if this blog thing is still here, and you click back and read this, I wonder what you will think.
Probably something along the lines of "Wow, you were such a new mom."






Not that it amounts to a hill of beans to anyone other than me, but a lot has been going on lately. Boring on the outside, but pretty busy inside. Kind of like that sign I want for the kitchen that says "A good hostess is like a duck; calm and unruffled on top but paddling like hell underneath". Replace 'hostess' with 'wife' or 'mom' and I think it would still work.












I don't think we'll make it to a year. Kaelyn is on the verge of only wanting solid foods and a bottle. Which is fine, and she's beautifully healthy, so what's the deal with it being so emotionally hard? I wanted to go a whole year and we are falling two months short? Not the end of the world. When we had to start supplementing formula it was emotionally hard, and I dealt with it, and I'll deal with this. It's just one of those things I guess is more sensitive than I thought it would be for me. There's a cocktail napkin for me this to go along with the kitchen sign:

















And let's see if you can guess the other constant struggle:



I'm over it. I do the best I can. (Why is this so stressful for me and hard to let go of?!?!) And Ben is God's personal gift to me for all the help he pitches in. But I'm done trying, I'm telling myself I'm done stressing. This is my public declaration. .



Here, here.






And oh, the itch has returned. I am finally ready, and now I just have to figure out how and when. Time to break 'em out...


I've downloaded some new Black Eyed Peas, and I'm ready..




Speaking of ready, REALLY ready for


Hello out there, does anyone else have this issue? Is it just us??



Gone are the days like when I was growing up of Grandma living down the road and dropping the kids off for the night or the weekend (which is another emotionally difficult thing I'll be facing. Back to the cocktail napkin. I mean really.) It's who has time, who do we ask, who do we trust, how much do we pay, where do we go, hey wow you look really nice in something other than sweats! days.


Don't get me wrong, Ben and I have a lot of laughs after K's bedtime plopping down with some pizza and a game of Rummikub (which sorry babe, but I DOMINATE) but I think it's time we stepped it up a notch. Glammed it up a bit. That's my next goal.
I'll keep you posted.
And there you have it. There's my random random update for now.
;) dae